What Dreams May Come
Have you ever had dreams that had long overreaching plots?
Lately mine haven’t been too pleasant just because of the stressful days of school, but recently I had a dream that wrapped up a long arc of dreams since Middle School.
Backstory
Picture it. Lunch Time. The first day of school. Waco, Texas. 1997.
I was enjoying my PB&J sandwich and conversing about the triumph of finally reaching middle school.
It was then that I noticed him. A Puerto Rican boy I’d seen out of the corner of my eye. A Mr. Eddie (I forgot his last name). In my mind, he was the most beautiful male I’d seen in all my 12 years.
Being the innocent 11 or 12 year old I was, I arranged it so we sat a table by his and I had a direct view of his face. I had no intention on acting on the crush as I later found out that he ran with a “delinquent” crowd, but I thought he could get it anyway. (And by “get it” I mean absolutely nothing at all as I thought you could get pregnant by kissing at that age…)
So anyway, since I couldn’t act out my wishes in real life, my subconscious carried them out at night…
The First Dream
Eddie and I were inseparable. We were best friends, lovers (which meant we kissed…12 years old…yeah) and almost like oxygen for each other. (In hindsight that seems quite unhealthy, but whatever…pubescent perceptions of love…)
One day, Eddie disappeared with no warning. I searched for him everywhere…asking his friends, family, anyone that might know where he went, but to no avail.
My 11 year old heart was broken.
I remember that dream in much more detail (won’t bother with writing it here) because it was almost as if it was more like a memory than a dream. I remember it being extremely sensual (in that I could smell, taste, hear and feel more vividly than usual). I really did feel some deep emotions even after I woke up…though I didn’t really understand them.
Present Day
Over the past 10 years or so, I’ve had occasional follow up dreams about me searching for Eddie. They were always very vivid and resulted in emotional days.
I just woke up from the same dream…and you know what? This time I finally found him.
The Dream
I had some kind of powers (?!?!) that allowed me to travel to any location I wanted. Out of all the places in the world, I chose to be where he was and found out that I had a daughter he’d been raising for the past 10 years. (LOL apparently in my world, males can have children.) He said he’d left because he didn’t want me to have to deal with my family and having a child. He was also a bit bitter which I… you know…handled…(I’m not 12 anymore…LOL). In the afterglow, I decided to stay with him so we could be a family and raise the child together. I was so happy that I’d found my lost “love” after all these years…
Just like the previous dreams, this one was very vivid. Right now I’m feeling extremely resolved and filled with some emotion that I guess would be akin to the feeling you get when you realize you’ve found the person you’re supposed to spend the rest of your life with.
It ‘s interesting that the dream finally had a resolution after all this time. I know that probably doesn’t mean anything, but it makes me wonder if perhaps I’m going to find something I’ve been looking for all my life sometime soon.
Time will reveal.
