Oh…
Life Coach Suggested Reading this after some revelations in today’s session :
Took the quiz on the website and I scored equally in these three areas :
Avoiders usually come from performance-based homes that value mastery, encourage independence and self reliance and discourage the expression of feelings or needs. These homes lack affection, tenderness or personal discussions. The focus is responsibility.
Avoiders respond to the anxiety of not having comfort and nurturing by learning to take care of themselves. They restrict their feelings and needs and become independent. So, as adults they avoid emotions and neediness because that’s what they learned to do as kids. The spouses of avoiders have similar complaints. I don’t get any affection and my spouse doesn’t seem to really need much. I can’t get close.
Pleasers usually grow up in a home with an overly protective or angry critical parent. Pleaser children do everything they can to “be good” and avoid troubling their reactive parent. These kids don’t get comfort: rather, they spend their energy comforting or appeasing their troublesome parent. As adults, Pleasers tend to continually monitor the moods of others around them to keep everyone happy. Eventually, they can become resentful and break down or leave the relationship.
Growing up with an unpredictable parent, Vacillators’ needs aren’t top priority. Without consistent parental affection, they develop feelings of abandonment. By the time the parent feels like giving again, their child is tired of waiting and too angry to receive. As adults, Vacillators are on a quest to find the consistent love they never received as children. They idealize new relationships, but then get tired of it once life (and the relationship) gets less than perfect.
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In other words, I’m pretty much a wreck…good to know, lol!
BUMP EMOTIONS!
EFF YOUR LIFE!
14 HOUR WORKS DAYS FOR ALL!
NEVER TRUST A BIG PEEN AND A SMILE!
MY CPU KEEPS ME WARM AT NIGHT!
Ugh this is hard…
*turns to page 1.
