The Cult of True Womanhood
So…it’s finals week. Since my major is primarily literary, I have lots of 10 page papers due soon. I actually don’t mind writing them and can write them fairly quickly. It’s just that I have to have a plan and I don’t have much of a plan for any of them.
I hope you all will allow me to take this time to get my mind in the general vicinity of what one of the papers is about…
Victorian Women and the Cult of True Womanhood
Don’t bow out on me yet, I promise it’s all relevant and somewhat interesting.
So…
Back in the day, proper Victorian women were pious, pure, submissive and domestic. For the uninformed, pious meant she was religious, pure meant she was sexually pure, submissive of course meaning deferring to the penis holders, and domestic in that she was the cooker/cleaner/ child care-er.
Now looking at women today, is there much of a difference of what women are expected to be?
I was talking to a friend about this notion of submissiveness. He was saying that he expected his wife to be submissive and that he didn’t want her to have to work among other things. It was her job to be his wife and that was it.
Now if I were a dude, I would probably be like my friend. Why would I want a woman who doesn’t need me for anything? It’s a man’s duty and even inherited necessity to provide for his family. How could I do that for a woman who can provide for herself?
But as a female, I battle with this ideal of “true womanhood” and my desire to fulfill it.
On one had, this way of thinking is extremely bothersome. It made me think that I will probably forever be single because I’m just too full of pride to submit to anyone and I have this need to not need anyone for anything. Me? Walk around barefoot and pregnant all the time? Following around after my husband and believing in anything he says just because he has a penis? Being happy with essentially being someone’s maid and nanny? HAIL NAW! F that I said….
On the other hand, it would so nice to just sit back and let someone else take the reigns. It would be nice to just handle family life while the husband is out being the provider. It would be nice to just have to worry about keeping the house clean, making sure everyone is nourished spiritually and physically, and having a balanced role in that the male is the provider and the female is the nurturer.
Even the Bible says it’s supposed to be like that.
It would be nice, but does that really ever work anymore? Can a woman truly be happy depending completely on someone else? Is it possible to fully submit to one’s husband and trust them enough to place your life in their hands?
I’ve never seen it work before. I’ve always seen wives get taken advantage of…or seen it thrown in their face that they are dependant on their husbands. I couldn’t place myself in that position…
I’m hoping if it happens that I am meant to marry someone, God will show me that person by perhaps instilling that desire of deference in me, but until then… I just don’t know.
