Grrrr!
One of my hugest pet peeves: The inability of people to have an intelligent, mature discussion.
I think college has jaded me a little. It’s always been an unsaid rule that when commenting on someone else’s opinion, one should criticize the argument, not the person making the argument. Also, it is unsaid that everyone is entitled to their own opinions and that people should respect that and act accordingly.
I’ve said before, like in the last entry, that when I state an opinion, I don’t pass judgment on others, I just say what’s best for me or what I believe to be true based on my knowledge.
Usually though, someone always takes it upon themselves to attack the issue and discredit the person who raised it.
Here’s an example:
I was really excited after my African American History class because I learned more yesterday about the subject than I have in my entire life. I was also coming off a high of a discussion that raised some questions. Here were some of them:
1. Would the number of African Americans in North America be the same if we were not brought here by slavery hundreds of years ago?
2. Would African Americans have higher levels of respect or success in America if we immigrated later like eastern Europeans once did?
3. If we stayed in Africa (in an alternate universe where we were never forced to be slaves in the new world), considering the amount of poverty and disease present today and conversely considering great civilizations like ancient Ghana or Mali, would the race be better off there? Would we have as many opportunities as African Americans do today?
I was like, “wow I never thought of these things before!” Wanting to hear more opinions, I posed the same questions to members of an online community Cocoa Lounge.
Big mistake.
As soon as I posted it, someone was like, “What you fail to understand is that without the effects of colonization and exploitation that stagnated Africa and her people, present day Africa might be different. It was through the oppression of Black/African people that provided the Western world with what they have now. If Europeans had stayed in Europe and Africans in Africa, I might even dare say it would be the Europeans who would be in the shit hole.”
What?! What did I fail to understand? I didn’t even said what I DID understand, I just restated the same questions that were brought up in class! Why are you attacking me?!
I said responded with:
“It was an objective question. i don’t “fail to understand” anything. I haven’t said what my answers to these questions are, I was just restating issues that were raised in class.
But anyway, you answered the question that you think disease and poverty wouldn’t be prevalent because there was no European intervention, so I’ll say nothing more.”
Then someone else was like:
“what is an objective question? and what is an objective answer? what is objectivity? And by whose standard?”
What the hell?! Just answer the questions! And by the way, if objectivity was by someone’s standard, then it wouldn’t be objective anymore. It would be subjective.
I pulled out the dictionary for textbook definitions just so someone couldn’t challenge me on what “objective” or “subjective” meant. I responded with:
“objective, uninfluenced by emotions. subjective, modified by individual bias”
and the dude was like,
“do u apply these selected dictionary meanings to yourself?”
By now I was getting REALLY irritated.
“In these particular answers yes I did apply them because whether the definitions are from the dictionary or not, that is what objective and subjective means.
Why is it so hard to give an answer? Everyone is so critical of the questions. As I said before, I did not come up with them, I’m just restating what was discussed in class as I was curious about the opinions of CL members.”
I hadn’t visited CL in a while, and this conversation reminded me why. People are so critical…they love to hear themselves talk and try to discredit others so they can feel superior.
Is it really so hard to ask a question and actually have someone answer it without having to worry about being attacked for being inquisitive in the first place?!?!?!
To quote Ms. Pass, these people are “lint in the pocket of progress and mature discussion. “
