Shoulder Lean
There was a Women’s forum event for my job yesterday. Didn’t have time to go, but did get the handouts from it. The title was “Leading with Grit and Grace”…mostly a remix and promo for Lea.n In by Shery.l Sand.berg.
I keep hearing about it, but haven’t really looked into reading (I’ve two books in progress right now).
Reading through quotes from this handout though, I think I might check it out :
“When looking for a life partner, my advice to women is date all of them: the bad boys, the cool boys, the commitment-phobic boys, the crazy boys. But do not marry them. The things that make the bad boys sexy do not make them good husbands. When it comes time to settle down, find someone who wants an equal partner. Someone who thinks women should be smart, opinionated and ambitious. Someone who values fairness and expects or, even better, wants to do his share in the home. These men exist and, trust me, over time, nothing is sexier.”
I ain’t trying to date the bad ones on purpose, lol. Those characteristics are in no way attractive…we already went over what “se.xy” means to me. I keep hearing that the other kind exists…*peeks head out front door to see…
“Leadership is about making others better as a result of your presence and making sure that impact lasts in your absence”
I agree. I am 100% about upping the skills of my team. If we’re all strong, that makes us so much more powerful. If someone fails, I feel like I’ve failed them.
“The upside of painful knowledge is so much greater than the downside of blissful ignorance.”
Also agree for the most part, though you have to be careful…sometimes knowing more makes people so much more cynical…I struggle with this.
“When women work outside the home and share breadwinning duties, couples are more likely to stay together. In fact, the risk of divorce reduces by about half when a wife earns half the income and a husband does half the housework.”
Hmm…is this true?
“She explained that many people, but especially women, feel fraudulent when they are praised for their accomplishments. Instead of feeling worthy of recognition, they feel undeserving and guilty, as if a mistake has been made. Despite being high achievers, even experts in their fields, women can’t seem to shake the sense that it is only a matter of time until they are found out for who they really are- impostors with limited skills or abilities.”
I agree with most of this, but not that last bit. I don’t feel like an imposter, but I don’t accept compliments well. I’m not entirely sure why…haven’t explored it.
“Success and likeability are positively correlated for men and negatively for women. When a man is successful, he is liked by both men and women. When a woman is successful, people of both genders like her less.”
Likely…in application to people who are insecure and see other people’s situation as a reflection on them.
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But yeah…like I need any encouragement in this thought-line…
I think she talks about this, but I really need to stop feeling weird about embracing female beast mode.
Was reading a Black boy blog that was talking about how dudes like women who are feminine (?)…and went into this long thing about how they should be soft and submissive and all that…
Kiiiinda feel like…
Dudes that don’t have their isht together mind don’t matter, dudes who have their isht together matter don’t mind.
I’m glad some commenters made the point that a chick who is sure of herself won’t automatically get in line for any dude. If you feel threatened /nagged/run over by a chick, she isn’t for you…and she probably requires a stronger personality.
Strong doesn’t mean azzhole/thug/bad boy. It means secure. A dude that is aware of himself and has accepted the way he is. What that looks like in practice can vary…A Cliff Huxtable (still nice and agreeable, but he was undeniably the father/leader of that family) a Dwane Wayne (he had a bit of azzhole, but he was still agreeable for the most part), even a Mr G. (self identifies as being insecure, but it’s internal. He’s not going to care about/judge someone else’s success and failures because he’s too busy living life and getting isht done.)
But yeah…leaning in? I can dig it.
