Tokenism
It’s interesting to be the only person of your race in one of your social circles. The perspectives you get are really different.
Hung out with my Sorors last week and people went around the table talking about their relationship situations. It was alarming to me how they accepted dysfunction as normal…like it’s normal that your dude thinks you wanting transparency is threatening to him. Or it’s okay to stay with someone who has different expectations for a relationship than you do. That kind of stuff never really goes away…
Conversely, when talking to my non-black friends about relationships, they don’t tend to talk about the same things…it’s like their issues are different. No problems with transparency or expectations. They’re not perfect, but they don’t have the same insecurities that my other friends have.
I mentioned to my Sorors that I knew a good amount of people that are happy with their relationships/marraiges and would think that their issues are strange ones to have. They asked me if they were white. I said yes. They threw out my comments.
I don’t know if it’s age or what, but I thought that was shady…like Black people have a monopoly on insecure relationships? I really don’t think that’s the case…
Then there’s friendship.
Being the token friend.
It’s like you represent your race…but there’s an extra layer of complication when your interests place you as an outlier among members of your own race too. Like my main social circle are mostly liberal white male geeks. I mesh with them because I’m a geek to the core as well (though I’m not liberal).
It gets wierd when talking about relationships or if they have questions about “cuffing season” or other similar not so proud of the home team topics. They think I’m a good catch as a nice looking geek chick who actually knows what she’s talking about and they side eye me for my relationship choices of choosing dudes with potential over dudes with documented successes.
…
Though I guess you probably should have come into your potential to some degree by your late 20’s/early 30’s….
Then the token fan thing…
Was doing my daily bi-weekly stalking check in with Mr G. and saw he had a performance at a musical festival in Vancouver last weekend. Was looking to see if people had video of any new music…or reviews of what happened.
Not a ton of feedback, just that people thought it was “epic”.
Though I heard he asked if any Black chicks were in the audience. Saw video of him doing that at another concert too…
I’d totally go and plan to go to anything he holds in Atlanta, but I am weary of those mosh pits. I’m short and small boned. Not trying to be destroyed…
But yeah I thought it strange that no one was very specific about that performance other than it being “epic” and him “killing it”…
Saw on FB that he was on a song with a bunch of popular Atlanta rappers.
Again, made me question his “fans”…comments like :
“Donald is the only thing worth anyone’s time on this song. Rest of these fools can go jump off a bridge.”
“Gambino for the love of god please stop making tracks with whack ass rappers. Your verse went in though you’re a beast.”
“Yea even tho you’re on the track Donald its still not worth listening to at all, whatsoever. Trinidad James alone is an atrocity of a failed abortion.” < YIKES!
“You’re too intelligent for these other rappers, why are you supporting them in any way? The addition of your music handle is the only thing that gives that song any credibility. ”
(Then posted some lyrics to a song describing how he didn’t fit in with Black people)
“At first there was a lot of gorilla booty noise and then it got to the good part Childish haha good job man.” < Really?
Most of the comments were like that. Really rubbed me wrong…the other talents on that song are very popular in Atlanta. They dominate the airwaves here. I personally may not be a fan of Trap music, but I respect their work as everything has its place. It’s just a different genre of rap is all.
It was like they were saying you’re too good to associate yourself with Black culture/Black people. We like you as the non-threatening black dude like on Community or on your songs that aren’t specific to Black culture.
Just really rubs me wrong…kinda goes back to what I was talking about the other day.
I mean I guess when you’re a fan of someone, you’re really a fan because of what that person or institution represents to you.
For me it’s a bit narcissistic as I see him as a representation of who I would be as a dude (similar issues growing up as the smart black token)…and if I had the testicular fortitude to go 100% in whatever I set my mind on…inspiration that way and a reminder that there’s nothing to it but to do it.
For some of his female fans, he’s a non-threatening black dude they could see themselves dating that’s “Black” enough to make their parents mad/seem cool to be associated with but not “too Black”. (Actually saw a tweet saying all that).
For some of his dude fans, he’s again a non-threatening Black dude they could see themselves hanging out with..that again fulfills the “cool black friend” quotient.
Whatever your reason for being a fan, does it make it any less credible if it’s for a shallow and a little bit racist reason?
“Clapping for the wrong reasons” indeed.
Really interested in introducing his music to some college friends at my housewarming/listening party. We all mostly had similar token issues, have a large percentage of geekiness as graduates of an engineering school, and we’re all around his age. Trying to grow the fanbase among his peers…
